Well, I now know at least part of the impetus behind Shortstuff's advances on Sunday night. Okay, so she might have missed me while I was away in Derby but I think part of her efforts relate directly to having seen one of my Ex's for the first time. Perhaps she wanted to make sure she kept my attention focused in the right direction?

If I had to reason which of my Ex's, Shortstuff had to have been the most curious about it would have been the one present at my niece's christening. As it turns out she is a cousin of a cousin of the mother or something... its a big family in a small town and I've still not figured out all the connections of that clan!

Basically, I think Shortstuff is in a state of shock having discovered that my ex is nothing like the kind of girl she expected, or for that matter, would have expected me to have been involved with.

I will admit I'm finding the whole situation thoroughly hilarious and instead of making reassuring noises in her direction, I'm having a good laugh over the whole matter. Shortstuff is absolutely perplexed – I'm certain she thought my handful of prior companions were all escapees from the nutty wing or otherwise a bit further down the scale completely. Heaven forbid, that there could actually be a normal, good looking woman other than her in my past!

She has pretty much always given me the impression that there wasn't any conceivable chance that any of my ex's would come close to her – it isn't that she's up herself (quite the opposite) she just seemed to have been motoring under the idea the skeletons in my closet were hapless weirdos or summat. Whereas this particular girl was quite something else altogether ...And for Shortstuff to know that, can't be a bad thing. It certainly focused her attention a bit come bedtime :)

Me, I'm just as shocked to have laid eyes on her again myself.

Back then I wasn't half the screwed up case I am now with all my many over-analyzed woes real or perceived.

And the relationship this particular Ex and I had was barely deserving of that title, but for me at least, and I like to think there was some reciprocation on the other side, it wasn't entirely disposable.

We met in a nightclub (as you do), friend of a friend and such, and the introductory phase was somewhat err... short. Anyway having started the relationship on that kind of footing it never really got away from it. I would say we were 'together' for about a month-ish and although it wasn't totally baseless shagging and nothing else I decided to call it a day.

And that was basically that, apart from the odd times here and there, whenever a particular boyfriend wasn't up to the job that we would bump into each other. I suppose I could say I was being used in a way perhaps, but I seriously doubt the whichever the other guy was at the time(s) ever knew anything at all so if there was nothing to be jealous about, I wasn't being used for that purpose. Maybe she was using me for sex (which admittedly for a bloke is a decent confidence booster!), maybe there was something else there under the surface – it wasn't like we weren't exactly friendly but it was like two people with impenetrable defenses refusing to ever let anything go.

Like we could give our bodies with barely a thought, but actually risking an emotional connection? She will probably never know it but I wasn't entirely cold about it all, I still do have a fondness for the memories. It was just two people who couldn't stop it putting on a front for each other and where in some regards I don't regret sparing myself all the hassle and baggage that any relationship with her would have had, there is always that little bit of me that wonders if the glimpses of who we were when we talked could have ever been anything really special. I'm probably still in nostalgic fantasy land with that last sentence...

Anyway, back to the history bit - We bumped into each other like a that a few times over a period of about 5 years and the last time was a few months before Shortstuff and I got together. The next time we spoke I knocked her back because I had just started that new relationship and that was the last we ever spoke.

She knew I was there too (I don't camouflage easily in any social setting I've yet discovered!) and my curiosity would so love to know what she was thinking. Probably something like, he still looks like a twat or he's aged badly... Who knows? Could she have wanted to say hello too, just for old times sake?

Shortstuff even decided to tell me that I could go and speak to her, which was selfless of her because I expect she didn't really want me too, but with the situation and the people around, it just didn't seem right.

Maybe it's for the best.

Its wholly academic in the scheme of things now but it can't hurt to say that I quite liked the look with her hair dyed blonde as it is now...